The best of Morning Musely: Why the hell do I still fly Qantas?
A new book has left me with a moral dilemma
Paul Keating used to say: “In a two-horse race, back self-interest”.
I was reminded of that quote as I finished former AFR Columnist Joe Aston’s book ‘The Chairman’s Lounge’, where he feasts on the entrails of Qantas management decisions under Alan Joyce as CEO and Richard Goyder as Chairman.
First, a disclaimer/conflict-of-interest here.
I’m a massive fan of Joe.
I’m also a massive fan of Qantas.
Cue Natalie Imbruglia… ‘Nothing’s fine, I’m torn’.
Joe’s stewardship of the ‘Rear Window’ column was a must read for me in the last decade. He used his pen as his weapon skewering the bullshit of corporate Australia and served it hot and steamy most days.
In his final column, Joe wrote:
‘Rear Window’s style evolved (and its rigour improved), but my primary motivation never really changed, and that was to entertain. It was simply the most riotous fun exposing the rampant spin over substance in Australian business and politics, and demonstrating just how thin that veneer is.
My prize was colluding with the readers, asking “Do you see what I see?” as together we waded through the daily barrage of hopeless, ridiculous, turgid, untrue spin in a money-go-round system where everyone else is enfranchised to play along.’
Joe’s book lays out the case (with detailed evidence) that Management and the Board of Qantas have been careless in their responsibilities to their customers and staff over the past decade or so, purely for the benefit of the bottom line.
Qantas used the cover of Covid to structurally change the business putting profit ahead of customer satisfaction. (“Never let a good crisis go to waste” is a Churchillian management mantra, but this goes deeper). Their brand/customer tracking was/is in the toilet and still hasn’t recovered to pre-pandemic highs.
Qantas illegally sacked 1700 maintenance workers. Dodgy as hell and proven in court.
Qantas monumentally fucked up the Covid travel credits program. Admissions from the management. Followed by program being completely overhauled. Angry customers.
All while trading on the emotional brand equity of being the ‘national flag carrier’. Note: no such official title exists.
So here’s my dilemma.
I still love Qantas.
Here’s my (maybe flawed) logic.
Firstly I’m a plane nut. Or an Aerosexual as sometimes we are called. I can spot an Airbus from a Boeing miles away, and can recite the on-board safety video in my sleep.
In being so, I’ve been a long-term Qantas Frequent Flyer. Most recently a Platinum One.
Long story short it means you spend a shitload of cash with the airline. I’m lucky that I have work that takes me overseas regularly, hence that spend isn’t always coming out of my own pocket, but I still determine who gets the dough and they do.
But let’s agree this corporate behaviour is not worthy of my custom. I wouldn’t put up with it if it was a fast-food restaurant let alone an airline in whom I trust my safety.
I think the answer is back to Keating’s quote. Self-interest.
Like some Trump voters last week, I care about me! I’m making a decision about what’s best for me! I can morally agree with the arguments against but when faced with a choice the known is better than the unknown. Right? Plus the lounge access etc. etc.
It’s all about meeeeeeee.
I get to check-in without waiting in long lines. My luggage comes off first allowing me a faster getaway. And yes the lounges etc.
Qantas gamify their loyalty so well I feel it’s almost impossible to leave them. It’s like being stuck in an Apple store. Good luck if you want to say the other ‘A’ word out loud (Android). You’re trapped! You know it. They know it! And the torture continues.
I actively know I’m trapped yet I’m seemingly locked in and I can’t/don’t want to escape.
Have you faced this dilemma? Being appalled yet enthralled at the same time?
I’ve come to the conclusion that there’s probably only one thing that would cause me to never set foot on a Qantas aircraft again.
Stories like this from yesterday…
Qantas made a strategic decision NOT to majorly overhaul it’s fleet over the past decade and many tin birds are flying at the end of their normal life cycle.
If you’ve boarded one recently you’ll notice that the majority of the 737-800 aircraft feel like they are holding together with sticky tape and chicken wire.
Budget Cuts? Who knows.
So if their safety record slips, I’m schlepping it with another carrier.
But for now, I guess the Spirit of Australia… continues?
Am I a bad person?
Have a great day,
Wade